Date:  Mon Feb 12, 2001 5:39pm

I'm new to clay in the cosmic scheme of time. Only a couple of years of serious claying, but growing like a mushroom in the dark, by myself. I don't belong to a guild. 

I don't go to shows (only one Tom Bishop show to meet up with Dana of Romantic Dolls), I don't attend classes, I don't have local claymates to get together with and muck about. I've never gone to ShrineMount or Ravensdale because I don't need a retreat to clay for 5 days straight ... I clay every day and everything else has to stand in line with a number in their hand to be attended to. 

I JUST NOW got all my personal laundry done from before my surgery...just had to juice to keep up with the boytoyloverman/hubs and house stuff. I was wearing flowery dresses and colors...all my black was packed and dirty. LOL 

Obsessive people don't need encouragement, ya see? Cheap people don't want to spend clay money on classes and retreats. Being a self proclaimed "house mouse" loving to stay at home and have me things handy, I'm just too lazy to pack up, travel, get there, wait for my spirit to catch up with me...just too much effort for this gal, honestly. Because I'm learning and sharing what I learn on the list I'm not drawn to go to retreats. 

YOU ALL are my retreat, all the posting list members are my claymates and it doesn't matter if we are not in physical proximity...we are in EMOTIONAL PROXIMITY...and that's more important. 

Ya know how it is when you go to a retreat of any kind, don't know the folks, feel shy and uncomfortable because you don't have your neenee blanket and favorite pillows and the cooking is not something your tongue recognizes and gosh.... I remember a number of Japanese/Church retreats where strangers would be coming up to me talking in a language I was not schooled and pinching my cheeks...stopthatgetouttahere... I wanna go home now, ok? 

Then when one comes back all the chores no one else keeps up with are awaiting your attention when you're still "high" on Retreat energy. Ya right, like I want to make an appointment for all that. 

It's a personal thing, not an endorsement or indictment, it's just how I am. I want to make this very very clear for polymer clay community politics. I'm not putting anyone down, I'm just not putting myself out for anything outside of the clay and this list. My dance card is full and mad money earmarked to support me claymate vendors on the list. Outside of that everything else and everyone else has to wait in line behind the hoards that are already waiting who have blood and marriage ties. 

It's a matter of prioritization of time, energy and resources. There are claymates on the list who are on oxygen 24/7, who have life long physical challenges of MS and FMS, that going to Retreats could prove to be problematic. 

There are those on the list where the cost is prohibitive. There are those who have offspring of tender years and Retreats don't provide child care activities and services from the last time I've checked, so single mommies who don't live near their folks, even if they had that sort of money, are precluded from even thinking about such stuff. 

It hurts the heart to want stuff and be obstructed by health, energy, and resources. I want this list to be especially for these claymates. This is our retreat, and here we know each other, have forged bonds, gone to visit to meet in person, grown to love one another those who have made the effort over time. 

This is where my energy is committed because where do our claymates of special needs go to have fellowship and information? That's why I encourage personal Rambles, where folks open up and share about their lives. How are we to come to know one another without a safe space to open up without some impatient flamer saying "Hey I was lurking here for Polymer Clay Tips and Hints and I don't care that your dog got spayed and went cross eyed." ?!? Go else where, is what I say, if personal stuff bothers you, fills your inbox with real people sharing their real life of which polymer clay is just a part, then there are other lists they can join...here let me make it easy for them...

04/21/05 175 yahoo groups on polymer clay 

there, if you wince each time there is an ATTA GIRL \(*o*)/ and grind your teeth on the loving shimpoipoi (Japanese all better noise for the uninitiated), and roll your eyes when we bless each other... go join another list. 

I know what sort of garden I'm tending here. But if you love polymer clay, like folks in general, have a couple of jokes to share, desire good fellowship that is positive and supportive, then this is the list for you. 

If you're financially challenged and have the courage to admit it along with your proclamation of love for polymer clay, someone on the list will send you clay, because someone else sent them clay, for we all know what unrequited love will do to someone's spirit. 

This list is all for spreading the joy of discovery in a claypen that recognizes that not all people have mobility, energy and resources to turn anywhere else for this sort of creative energy exchange. That's why I don't go to Retreats. That is why I am here, for those who can't go either, for one reason or another. 

We Be Our Own Retreat Every Day All Year Long...going on to our second year gang, must be doing something right. So there it is then, I had to spend the brain shares held hostage with this ramble....I feel much better now....LOL Now I can get back to the blend lesson that I'm building. 

xoxo NJ